Claire and Phil decide to reprise their role-playing adventure from last year's Valentine's Day. Meanwhile, Jay's surprise plans for Gloria keeps getting interrupted, and a secret admirer comes between Mitchell and Cameron.
It's Valentine's Day, and Phil and Claire decide to take it down a notch after what happened last year with their sexy alternate identities of Clive Bixby and Julianna. That Claire lost her panties in front of her father. And apparently, she hates the word "panties". Cameron, being the sweet guy he is, sends Mitchell flowers at work, only Mitchell's assistant doesn't deliver them. Cameron knows what it's about: Mitchell's assistant has a crush on him. Mitchell denies it, but Cam knows how adorable and irresistible Mitch is, but Cam's solution of firing him doesn't sit well with Mitchell.
Phil and Claire have to take a 6:15 reservation at a restaurant, but the place is packed…with people getting the early-bird special. But Phil is convincing Claire they don't need the crazy V-Day like they had last year; they can kick it with people who probably celebrated V-E Day, too. And Claire agrees, until she gets nailed by the guy driving a personal scooter through the restaurant. And it gets worse when Phil offers to drive it to the front for him…and likes it. It's time for her to head to the bathroom and change into Julianna. Of course, Phil doesn't have a clue, so she has to give him PLENTY of prompts. And not crashing into a table as he pretends to dump Claire to go meet Julianna at their hotel.
Jay and Gloria are at the same restaurant, only Jay has a plan this year. He'll pretend to not get the reservation so that the private chef and musicians he arranged can set up at his house. Sounds like a perfect plan, right? Of course, it's not a matter of IF it will screw-up, but how much and how funny it will be WHEN it screws up. And it took all of two minutes, as Gloria got them in the restaurant.
Meanwhile, the kids are at home, where Haley is bemoaning the fact that not only she doesn't have a date, but Alex has a date. Being on a phone with Jeremy while they watch Love Actually isn't much of a date, but Haley will prefer that to Manny's plan, which is to put the moves on her. Especially trying to convince her that getting David jealous by showing Dylan still texts her is not what an independent woman should do. It's not the Haley he knows.
Broderick, Mitch's assistant, schedules an appointment for him to interrupt their dinner, and Cam thinks he's a dear. As in wanting to mount his head in his trophy room. And Cameron was right: Broderick was trying to sabotage the relationship. Because he is attracted to Cameron. Must have been Cam's highly-inappropriate bicycle shorts. He even apologizes to him at the office.
Jay is upset because Gloria "is strapping on the feedbag at Ibiza", but Jay was saved by an angel. A big, gay angel. The reservation Gloria finds under Pritchett is actually Mitchell and Cameron's. Gloria is absolutely livid, but she can't be convinced to go into the house. Jay practically begs and pleads, but Gloria is his second wife who is tired of being treated like his first wife. Jay has no choice but to carry her into the house…where the musicians and chef aren't. She storms out and opens the garage, because that's where the chef and the musicians are. It turns out she knew what he was doing all along because he assumed she didn't think he was romantic and that she wasn't smart. But she wins, especially when she gets him the red motorcycle.
At Ibiza, Cameron hints around that Broderick actually has a crush on him instead of Mitchell, who doesn't believe it. And their romantic dinner goes downhill quickly, as Cam wants Mitch to call him and verify it. Or better yet, go over to Broderick's house and ask him. However, Broderick texts Mitchell his resignation, saying he acted unprofessionally when he tried to sabotage their relationship. Mitch and Cam wise up and apologize to each other, each secure in the knowledge that Broderick had the crush on them.
Julianna and Clive's date is on. After Clive spits out the apple-tini Juliana was having. Turns out, Clive does some covert work on occasion for the U.S. government. Although we're not certain what Julianna does for a living. But Julianna is just a bored housewife with a dark secret. And the card she just gives him isn't a gift card…or is it? And Phil takes the card…of the old woman who is sitting next to Claire. He goes up to the room. Claire calls him, and he gets ready on the bed with a bottle of champagne, a bouquet of flowers, and that's all. She'll be right out. And she is…to an empty bed. She calls him back, and Clive tells her she'll have to find him. They figure out they're in the wrong rooms, as the woman whose room Phil is really will tell him. They meet back at home, where Claire is ready to throw in the towel on the night, but Phil is not dissuaded, since they have their own bedroom to continue the evening. Except Manny has successfully convinced Haley to dump David for what he did, and suddenly there's music in the background. In the street, actually. Dylan brights his entire band with him to perform a love song for Haley. She rushes into Dylan's arms and thus Manny's hopes of wooing Haley are dashed.
In the end credits, Mitchell and Cameron order their food and the delivery man, Ryan, puts an extra tiramisu (again) and they ask him why he did it. He tells them that he just likes coming there and if they were single he will try to date them. Both Mitchell and Cameron think that Ryan has a crush on one of them and they quickly go to ask him.
(The characters striked out do not appear in this episode)
- Jay Pritchett
- Gloria Pritchett
- Manny Delgado
- Claire Dunphy
- Phil Dunphy
- Haley Dunphy
- Alex Dunphy
- Luke Dunphy (no speaking lines).
- Mitchell Pritchett
- Cameron Tucker
- Reid Ewing as Dylan Marshall
- Jeremy Rowley as Broderick
- James Greene as Elderly Gentleman
- Abraham Higginbotham as Ryan
- Edward Stanley as Maitre D'
- Nan Tepper as Older Woman
- This episode is a sequel to the previous Valentine's Day episode, "My Funky Valentine".
- Haley and Dylan get back together, after breaking up in "Mother Tucker".
- Manny's crush on Haley reappears from "Pilot" and "Great Expectations".
- We see a flashback of Cameron wearing the bicycle shorts he wore in "Strangers on a Treadmill".
- Alex has a date with Jeremy, her crush in "The Kiss".
- Neil, Craig, and Brian from "Travels with Scout", have a cameo appearance when Dylan sings his love song for Haley.
- Abraham Higginbotham, writer and producer for the show, plays the role of Ryan in this episode.
- Luke has no speaking lines in this episode. This is the second episode in which this occurs; The first time was in "Come Fly with Me".
- Alex and Jeremy have a phone date to watch Love Actually.